Domesticity: Help…..Please!


I’m changing the topics and the tone of my post this week. With everything we’ve been through as a planet, a nation, and as human beings I think it’s time to introduce a little humor to see if I can make you smile.

As I’ve written about before I’ve moved from Shreveport to Nashville, TN in the last 6 months. I have lived in Louisiana all my life and in Shreveport for the past 50 years. We lived in our Shreveport home for all 42 years of our marriage, so I haven’t moved a lot. I have come to understand a most distressing fact: for all of my 70 years I have been a “kept man.”

It’s my mother’s fault actually. From the earliest time that I can remember all of my socks and underwear somehow were laundered and placed back into the spot where they had always been. I guess I thought it was magic. When I moved into my house here I stood in front of my dresser with socks in one hand, underwear in the other. I realized that never in my life had I had to decide where this thing went. They were just there. I was confused and a bit hurt that I was so weak and clueless. Same thing in my kitchen. Where do spoons and forks and towels go? Who decides such things? Over the past few months, several folks who have been in my kitchen have moved things around to where they thought things should go. Isn’t there a standard somewhere? Isn’t there an app for that?

Is there a tutorial on how to fold fitted sheets? Who designed these in the first place? I have tried and tried – my daughter, one of my daughters-in-law, and a lady friend have tried to teach me. But every time I try they always turn out to look something like a poorly-made cone of cotton candy.

And the difficulties of teaching a 70 something man now living alone the details of domesticity go on and on. Why dryer sheets? Do I have to fold clothes?

I do have a housekeeper who comes in every other week, and luckily she understands my shortcomings – although she seems to mumble in Spanish a lot and then laugh as she cleans my house.

I’m asking for constructive help here! One of my good friends who never withholds his true opinions suggested that the only solution was to find a good woman and re-marry. Well, I’m trying! Anyone else?

2 Comments on “Domesticity: Help…..Please!”

  1. Hi Doc. Happy 2021! I clicked on your face in FB yesterday. I’m sorry about the death of your loving wife. I plan to order your book soon. Why did U relocate to TN? Family ? Grandchildren? Nice city. Take care. Stay well.

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